The answer is, you can’t! Really. At least not for me. You can encourage me all you want, tell me I can easily do it. All that will do is make me feel awkward. Okay, okay! I tell you I am scared, but that is just how I feel.
In my case, you do not need to say I can do it. I know I can. I have already done this a couple of times. I left the Philippines to live in a foreign land with no family nor friends and no knowledge of the language. I have switched jobs as well, and was successful. I gave a presentation at a customer, in German. I have already given demos. I get out of bed every morning! Okay that does not really count, but that is my comfort zone too. Just a while ago, I went bouldering despite my fear of heights.
You see, the problem with me is that I am a tad pessimistic. I try not to be, but there is always this part of me that asks “What if I fail?” The optimist in me says “You have done this a couple of times before, what are you afraid of?”
Ever heard the saying “just throw that person in the cold water”? Funny thing is, someone did this to me. Literally. And I don’t know how to swim. Or let me rephrase that: I can swim, but the deep water just scares me. It’s like something lurking under water is just waiting to pull me down. Luckily my best friend was near, so I did not drown. Figuratively, I think it might work. But who knows?
So if you hear someone telling you they feel uncomfortable getting out of their comfort zone, tell them “You have done it a couple of times already, you are just forgetting your capabilities. ” That might help.
Silke 